Today is Wednesday.
The day that myself and the scale do our weekly face-off.
Today also marked my first Power90 day of “measurements” to compare my before/after measurements. I’ve actually been a little nervous about this. Even though my husband has already started noticing a difference in me, there are some days I simply can’t see it. I question it. I am in disbelief of it.
I’ve owned Power90 for years now. Long before P90X existed and became the talk of the town. I have honestly lost count at how many times I’ve started and never bothered to finish the program. All of those beginnings with never reaching a completion left me feeling like “what is the point in starting again?”
This time I’ve really committed. To a lot of things in life actually. I think by doing that in other important areas of my life, it has helped me to remain committed to this part of my life. This journey to health. It’s a journey involving exercise, nutrition, and my family on the path to wellness. It’s also a journey about how I look at myself in the mirror, about vanity, about the difference between taking care of my temple and worshiping this temple instead of the One who created it.
Love the Journey.
With that being said, this morning I faced off with the scale and the measuring tape.
Here is what I found:
Last Week’s Weight: 137.0 LBS
Last Measurements Taken:
Upper Arm: 11.25″
This Week’s Weight: 134.8 LBS
Upper Arm: 11″
Weight: -2.2 LBS
Waist: -1.5 inches
Hips: -4 inches
Thigh: -0.25 inches
Upper Arm: -0.25 inches
I was surprised by the pounds lost. It feels good to feel like I got back on track from vacation. I think the inches lost are the most surprising to me. I was so surprised that I took some pictures of me in my workout clothes in front of the mirror. Then I started going through my files to find some pictures I took of me in my workout clothes the last time I took my measurements. I put the two up on the computer screen side by side and was shocked.
Now, while I understand some women would dance around the house doing fist pumps in the air, let me explain why I was shocked. It was because of the questions I heard myself asking in my own head.
Why can’t I see myself the way He made me?
Am I still looking at myself and only seeing the flaws the World points out?
The painfully honest answer: Yes I am.
I see crooked teeth that I dislike so greatly I go out of my way to try and not show them in pictures. I see a nose I think is too big and skin which is aged and tainted with imperfections. I see fingernails that won’t grow because they break every other day on hands that are large instead of dainty. I see feet too large on a body too small and far more jiggle than the swimsuit models in the checkout isle of the grocery store have. I see hair with a few grey’s and split ends, and no current “style”. I see chapped lips and dry skin and freckles. Lots and lots of freckles.
Father, help me to ward off the lies of the Evil One.
The lies that say I’m not beautiful enough.
Not tall enough. Not thin enough.
Not good enough.
Help me to look in the mirror and see what you see.
A wife. A mother. A friend.
A woman trying to learn humility in the face of her pride.
Help me to see health in the face of vanity.
Self-Control in the face of indulgence.
To see, and know, that who I am is not my body.
To know, and love passionately, that my body, myself, am nothing next to you.
To know, and love passionately, it’s not about me. It’s about you.
To know, and love passionately, You and You’re love for me.
Now I can appreciate the results.
I can appreciate what my purpose in this really is all about.
I can appreciate reading all the blogs of my fellow Weigh-in Wednesday bloggers and do my best to encourage everyone on their personal journey.
And. I can believe the results.
I’m going to continue with Power90 until I’ve seen it through. I’m going to continue watching what I eat and trying to be healthy. I’m going to call the doctor today and schedule my physical appointment and get the latest numbers for my cholesterol. I am hoping that I’ll see improvement.
I am so appreciative of my family and the encouragement they have given me. I’m appreciative of all of you who give me encouragement. I’m appreciative to the Lord for putting me right where I am right now in life.
So. I’m going to put on my GRRR face and keep going. I’m going to keep doing my PowerHour.
Do you have your GRRR face on?
Do you have your prayer on?